Tuesday, April 6, 2010

How much fun is my place of work?

Here is a collection of the emails we've received in the past three business days.

"New Policy: all special occasions, birthday cakes, showers etc. must be celebrated during the lunch hour, 12:30 to 1:30."
"The firm recently expanded its internet capability at a significant expense in order to accommodate the sending and receiving of firm emails and their attachments as well as the use of the internet for firm business.

Recently, however, we have experienced unacceptable slow downs due to non-business uses of our bandwidth, including movies and various forms of streaming video and audio.

We will shortly restrict these non-business activities to a minimum."
"It has come to my attention that some of you are wearing jeans (or slacks that look like jeans or knit sweat type pants) and wearing sneakers during the work day.

Please adhere to our NO JEANS AND NO SNEAKER policy."
Are you filled with warm fuzzies or what? Personally, I'm waiting for the "no personal items on the desk" and/or "no brightly colored items of clothing may be worn" email, just to round out the set. Or maybe they'll just throw my lunch out from the shared staff kitchen... AGAIN.

Ahh, office life. It's a blast.