Monday, February 16, 2009

A vegan nightmare (not for the faint of heart).

A good pal of mine was kind enough to point me to a website called This is why you're fat. And now, I will forever be haunted... by items such as the krispy kreme sloppy joe:



the bacon-burger-dog with cheese:



and the one that trumps that old atrocity, the turducken, any day: the "12 Bird True Love Roast".



After gazing upon this website, I feel that I have a new weapon in my arsenal to explain to people why I choose not to eat meat. Really? I can say. You find this appetizing?

Of the two pictures below,I can't decide which looks more disgusting: the hot dog encrusted with french fries, or the turducken wrapped in bacon. In case, gentle reader, you don't know what a turducken is, let me edify: it's a chicken stuffed inside of a duck stuffed inside of a turkey. Apparently some fine folks somewhere thought it wouldn't be quite complete without some strips of pork fat though.




















Now, the corndog pizza made me get a little analytical. See, this is not at all how I would make a corndog pizza. They did it all wrong! You gotta take the corndogs OFF of the sticks, and slice them in thick fat slices. Then use them as a pizza topping. Like, duh. One thing I do miss from my vegetarian days is the Morningstar Farms corndogs - those things are freakin good! Stupid Morningstar owned by stupid Kellogg, putting stupid eggs in stupid everything, grumble grumble other discontented noises...



Alright. If that didn't inspire you to eat a grilled veggie sandwich on sprouted whole wheat bread, nothing will. For those of you who actually ate the food items pictured here, I'll say a silent prayer for your arteries.

3 comments:

Dan said...

yum! have you tried the bacon explosion yet?

http://bacontoday.com/bacon-sausage-and-more-bacon-the-bacon-explosion/

melissa bastian. said...

I find the burnt finger BBQ far more disturbing.

Tom said...

That's a donut...with meat on it. Ugh. I eat meat and donuts, but never together. Ever. Just...no.

Actually, I don't eat much of either of those anymore these days. I'm not vegetarian by any stretch, but I have vegan friends, and they tell me scary things, and I listen to them, and I think, "I want to live. Please pass the salad."