Sunday, October 5, 2008

A Saturday Morning Scramble.
-correction-
A Sunday Evening Scramble-Hash.
(VeganMoFo)

Part One.

Fine, so a tofu scramble is like the most basic item in the vegan repertoire. Whatever. I don't care. I haven't made one in ages, and I woke up craving one. And once I got over the horrible spasming pain in my back and made it out of bed, I set to makin' one.

Now, scrambling is not a recipe type of process. It's cooking. You just do it. But it does involve steps, and to an extent those steps need to be done in an order.

The first step in this process is of course the tofu squishin'. I used to be quite intimidated by this; it kept me from cooking tofu for like three years. In fact, sometime soon I may dedicate an entire post to the art that is pressing tofu, so that when some novice is afeared of it, as I once was, they might stumble upon my words and have some real guidance. But anyway. The secret of my success with pressing these days? The Illustrated Oxford Dictionary, paperback. Or, sometimes, Campbell's Biology (Fourth Edition).

Step two: a little bit of a marinade. Why? Because that way, when your tofu starts a-fryin', it tastes like something edible instead of like raw tofu. Today, mine consists of basic salty things - worstershire, tamari, an "asian bar-b-q" sauce that I have around. To this I added some typical herby type things and some spice: garlic, parsley, oregano, tobasco sauce, and celery salt.

The third step being the combo of the products of steps one and two - once the tofu has been pressed till it can't be pressed no more, it can be mashed in with the marinade-of-sorts and let sit for a while. Mainly, that is, while we go grocery shop for the rest of the ingredients for the scramble.

-And then, tragedy!-

The scramble will not be fried today, no no. Right shoulder says nox. It's been saying nox to things all day, and I keep telling it to shut up, and as such it has become more and more vocal... to the point where now I feel like I need a sling. So... that there smooshed tofu will be nice and seasoned for tomorrow morning, when hopefully Mr. Right Shoulder of the Bad Attitude will have a little less to say about what my right hand can and can not do.

* * *
Part Two.

Well then. Sunday morning? Not so much. And you're not surprised. Look, I had a bad night on Saturday. Pain is not conducive to sleep. And Sunday afternoon I had an engagement. So instead the scramble became Sunday dinner. It also became somewhat of a frankenstein scramble hash.

I began again this evening by caramelizing half of a yellow onion, of course. I also tossed in some bits of raw red onion that had been stuck in the salad I'd taken home from last night's dinner - I hate raw onion and didn't want it to go to waste, and it seemed like a good use.

Once the onion was good and ready - also known as transparent and therefore edible - in went the pre-prepared tofu, along with two small chopped tomatoes. There was an additional, previously unplanned ingredient as well: almost an entire bowl of chili cheese fries leftover from dinner last night at Curly's. So, basically, curly fries, some beans, and some teese cheese, all chopped.

All of this went into the pan, and the pan went sizzle sizzle. I let it cook down until it became nice and dense and started browning in places. Browning in places is always good.

My efforts resulted in this hash-scramble, with bits of beans and potato and tomato and whatnot, that was akin to what you'll usually get served at Old Devil Moon or Kate's Joint. And sometimes for a Sunday night, that's not too shabby for a relatively quick dinner.


Tomorrow I go back to work, and once again become the only vegan in the office. The fun times, they are a-comin'...

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